


Food Fight!

by littleboxes



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Based on a Tumblr Post, Copious Descriptions of Food, Crack Treated Seriously, Fluff, Fluff and Crack, Food Fight, Gen, Never Let the Twins Watch Muggle Movies, throwing canon out the window, timelines what timelines?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-22
Updated: 2018-07-22
Packaged: 2019-06-14 07:21:44
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 924
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15383601
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/littleboxes/pseuds/littleboxes
Summary: Fred & George learn what a food fight is. It goes exactly where you expect.





	Food Fight!

   
*based off a tumblr post*

The Burrow was chaos. It was the twin’s birthday, which in their mind, translated to: ‘Do anything you want without consequences day’. Mr. Weasley’s hair was lime green, and he seemed to have grown horns, Ginny couldn’t stop hiccupping silver and green bubbles, and mushrooms sprouted from the ground behind Ron everywhere he went. They were gathered in the front room, and Fred and George were opening presents. “Oh! That’s from me!” Hermione said, as they picked up a rectangular package wrapped in blue paper. They unwrapped it to find several plastic boxes. They looked up, confused. 

“Hermione?” said George, “What’re these?” Fred finished. 

“Those are some of my favorite muggle movies, as well as a few my dad picked out.” 

“What do we _do_ with them?” 

“You watch them, of course.”

“How?”

“Well, earlier I help Arthur set up a television in your room. Come along and I’ll show you how to work it.”

   


*********************************** 

  


4 Months Later…

It was a rather noisy day in the Great Hall. Yesterday, Gryffindor had beat Slytherin in Quidditch. The Gryffindors were still celebrating, rather loudly, and laughing at the Slytherin’s sour expressions. At the table, Hermione, Harry, and Ron were talking. Up at the front of the table were Fred and George. They were abnormally quiet. “What’re you guys up to?” their friend Lee Jordan asked. “Well-”

“-we’ve got a plan in the works-”

“-but we’re waiting for the right time to execute it-”

“-if the timing is off-”

“-even by a bit-”

“It won’t work,” they finished together.

Lee looked at them skeptically. “I’m not even going to ask. If it’s got you guys this quiet, clearly, it’s something I don’t want to know about. Good luck.” He went back to eating. Fred and George looked at each other. They hadn’t forgotten about Hermione’s gift from four months ago. Rather, it had given them an idea. One of the movies had a scene called a “food fight”. It looked like the most fun ever. How could wizards have missed out on such a wonderful concept? They wanted to cause one in the great hall. It would be epic, the plates would never empty, endless ammo to sling at the Slytherins. They knew they had to wait until lunch (everyone would be too tired at breakfast) and for something to happen to hype up the Gryffindors. Now, the game had happened. While they rode the win, it would be the perfect time. They had contacted a few muggleborns from each house, so they could gather more information. Each of them had agreed to help. “Ready George?” “Ready Fred!”

   


It happened very quickly. One minute, Ron had been half listening to Hermione go on about S.P.E.W, then he heard a thump, and then Fred and George yelling “food fight!” As he turned around, they threw something. A few seconds later, Fred was throwing peas at the Ravenclaws, and George had a handful of- _something_ , aimed for the Slytherins. Soon enough, each table retaliated, until an all-out war had begun. Hermione was hiding under the table, not wanting to risk food getting stuck in her hair, and a disapproving look on her face. Harry had picked up his plate and aimed straight for Malfoy. Hannah Abbot, from Hufflepuff, hit Oliver Wood in the face with a piece of cake, and he started chasing her with handfuls of mashed potatoes. The Ravenclaw upperclassmen appeared to be working on something, while the younger students defended them. 

Suddenly, Ron got a face full of green beans. Fred guffawed at the look on his face, and Ron angrily heaved his plate back at him. Most of the food slid off during the flight, but the plate hit its mark. The Hall was filled with laughter, food, and angry yells. All of a sudden, movement stopped. Ron looked around in confusion, then saw what had happened. Professor McGonagall had a mince pie sliding down her face. Each student stared in horror, wondering who had done it. He couldn’t decide whether to risk laughing. However, once he noticed who'd done it, he couldn't help himself. There was Dumbledore, beard full of assorted lunch meats, with a hand in the air, ready to throw another pie. The rest of the students saw this, the war restarted, even more energetic than before. Pretty much the entire of Slytherin and Gryffindor were at each other, while the Ravenclaws appeared to have built _a_ _trebuche_ _t?_ McGonagall had retaliated, and now her and Dumbledore were amid their own personal war, using their wands for extra slinging capacity. As for the other teachers, Snape had left the Hall when the fight had started, Sprout and Flitwick were both helping their houses, apparently wanting to outdo each other. 

The fight was probably one of the best memories that Ron had of Hogwarts. It had gone on for practically the entire day. Long enough that classes had been canceled (Ah, the joys of Dumbledore being headmaster) Dumbledore’s beard looked like a pantry, McGonagall was practically bathing in mince pies, Flitwick had somehow been knocked unconscious, Ravenclaw’s trebuchet had launched several buckets full of food at the Hufflepuffs, leaving their entire table buried. Both the Slytherins and Gryffindors were exhausted from throwing food (people had given up using their wands, too messy-plus it was way more satisfying to throw it yourself). Hermione had come out from underneath the table(finally) and was unsuccessfully holding back laughter at Harry’s hair, which was thick with treacle tart. 

   


**Author's Note:**

> If anyone could make a TV work in a wizarding household it's Hermione


End file.
